Monday, April 4, 2011

Phone Wars: Part 2

The Sons-in-Law get in on the action, adding a further dimension to the Phone Wars: Daniel leaving a message on Mom's cell phone: "Hey, Mom! It's Daniel, your favorite Son-in-Law. I just called to tell you that I love you more than Houston does. Alright? Bye!"

Houston leaving a message on Mom's cell phone: "Hey, Future-Mom-in-Law! This is Houston. Just calling to say that I love you more than Daniel does, because I'm special ... and so are you... Well, see ya!"

Phone Wars

Because of General Conference Weekend, Diane and Houston (sister and future-brother-in-law) drove down from BYU-I to hang out with us. We had a great weekend (minus the fact that I had/still have a nasty cold)! Just after the end of the last session of conference, Diane and I both noticed that we had a missed call and a message from our mother. She just called to see how our weekend was. Well, Diane thought it would be smart to call mom on her cell phone first, just to prove that she loves mom the best. Totally cheap! was what I thought. And the Phone Wars begin!! Let me introduce the two sides of this war:

1st, the EVIL sister!! (I wish, only for the sake of the story, that she was a step-sister, so that I could say the evil step-sister ... or maybe my twin: the evil-twin sister!) ... DIANE

2nd, the GOOD, more loving sister ... LESLIE

(awful picture, I know...but give me a break! I'm sick!)

3rd, some third party observer/distractor of the mother (he made a few phone calls himself, detailing in messages his love for mother, and taking away from our time to leave mesages), ... BRIAN

1. The Battle of "Home Phone vs. Cell Phone":

My mother is not always good with her cell phone. She often forgets to check her messages. So, when the enemy decided to call her cell phone, I took the advantage of home phone! I called the home phone thinking someone may actually answer. Unfortunately for me, no one answered. But Diane was angry that I'd thought of this strategy first, and decided to try that tactic once I was finished. Unfortunately for her, it was busy when she attempted.

2. The Battle of "Leaving Billions of Messages":

While Diane was occupied with calling home phone and getting a busy signal, I called the home phone again ... this time leaving a message for mom, declaring my obviously greater love for her. In retaliation, Diane called the house phone again, and, again, it was busy, giving me the time to advance (call again, and leave another endearing message for mom).

3. The Battle where Diane appears to have the Advantage:

As you may imagine, Diane is becoming more and more furious with the situation, and she makes a different play: she calls the home phone, and actually talks to mom!!! I was incredibly frustrated that Mom would answer when Diane calls, when I called at least 2 times before that! (They tell me my facial expression was hilarious!) But Diane was deceitful: she also got the answering machine and was acting as though Mom had actually answered.

4. The Battle where Leslie takes over Diane's Advantage:

Well, I took that phone away from her and heard that it was only the answering machine ... Mom wasn't actually talking to Diane. I waited a short while, and then I left ANOTHER message for mom, further detailing my love for her. Haha! I said to myself. I've taken from my opponent the chance to fight back!

5. The Battle of Facebook

Diane posted her love all over facebook. A cheap shot, you may say to yourself. But, if you couldn't tell, this post itself is part of the war!!

6. The Battle of the Blog

Dearest Mommy (and may all of the world witness my profound words),

I love you dearly! Even though Diane did technically call you back first, I was the one who left you all those tender messages. I love you EVEN MORE! And I'll be the first to prove it when we arrive in Medford! I'll help you clean out the garage and plan Diane's wedding and anything else you need me to do.

Your Loving Daughter,


...Did I leave any important events out, Diane?