Sunday, November 27, 2011

Conversation at the Dinner Table

(Eating seeded grapes the size of your fist)

Leslie: Oh, these are seeded grapes.

Daniel: No, technically they're un-seeded grapes. Because for "seeded grapes", they'd have to add the seeds to the grapes.

Leslie: Now, I don't understand this. You swallow the seeds in watermelons, but spit out these grape seeds.

Daniel: These are a lot bigger and harder than watermelon seeds.

Leslie: No, they're not!

Daniel: Besides, everyone knows that watermelon seeds don't grow in your stomach and out your ears. But grape seeds do.

Leslie: Out your ears?!?

Daniel: Yea, ya know ... the vines come out of your ears here and then the grapes dangle out. (We laugh. You should be too, with a mental image like that.) I'm surprised you never learned that in all your biology classes.

Leslie: Oh, well, I never took "The World According to Daniel".

Daniel: Right.

Leslie: Well, I guess I'm taking that now.

Go ahead and covet dinner-time at the Holbrook's, where every meal-time conversation is deep and intellectual.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Grampa-isms Part 2


Daniel: Look, Grampa, there's a cat behind you, in the window.
Grampa (looking behind himself): Oh, look at that, there is!
Daniel: What should we do with it?
Grampa: Shoot it!

Daniel: Here, take your pills.
Grampa: No, they're for you. You're young and I'm a little older than you; you should take the pills.
Daniel: How much older are you than me?
Grampa: Oh, maybe 2 or 3 years.

Daniel: I think I'm going running.
Grampa: By yourself?
Daniel: You wanna come?
Grampa: If you don't run too fast.
Daniel: Do you like to run?
Grampa: I like a fast walk.
(If you could only see what a fast walk looks like ...)

(Grampa has chocolate all over his chin)
Daniel: Grampa, have you been eating ice cream?
Grampa (very seriously): No, I haven't had any.

Grampa (at church, in priesthood meeting, very loudly): Look at that big man on that little table! He's going to break that table!

At church on Sunday, a woman came up to Daniel and told him that in an earlier meeting, she walked by Grampa, and he reached over and pinched her bum. Good thing she was good-humored about it. It could've been an unnecessarily awkward situation. ... Oh wait ...

Grampa: Oh, boy, it's cold, I'm froze!
Leslie: Would you like a jacket?
Grampa: Yes, please.
(Leslie helps him on with his jacket)
Grampa: Oh, boy! Oh, boy! You saved my life!
(Drama-King -- His drama could rival my sister's)

Leslie: Grampa, are you still hungry? Would you like some more dinner?
Grampa: No, I'm not hungry.
Leslie: Well, do you need some ice cream?
Grampa (breaking out into a big grin): Yes, I would like some ice cream!

Grampa has a pronounced sweet-tooth. It's clearly visible when anything sweet is in view ... or in question. His whole world brightens when ice cream is in consideration. It's really cute to see his reaction!

Another time, Grampa kissed a fly-swatter. And then he tried to kiss me. You can imagine how that went over.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Grampa-isms Part 1

A few months ago, about the time we first moved here, I began a new feature in my journal. I call it "Grampa-isms", and I'd like to share it with you. It basically consists of sections of my journal that I devote to writing down funny things that Grampa says or does. And so, without further adieu ...

Grampa (grabbing my thigh): That's a nice leg!

Grampa: How long is your arm?
Leslie (sticking my arm out and in his face): About this long.
Grampa (running his fingers up my arm, from finger tips to shoulder, measuring it with his arms): Yea, that's a good length ... seems right.

(A few days later) Leslie: Grampa, how long is your arm?
Grampa (giving me a look of utter incredulity): How long is my arm?!? (shaking his head, he held out his arm) Like this. (Acting as though it were the craziest question in the world, not realizing that he'd asked me that before!)

Leslie: How do you feel?
Grampa (running his fingers up and down my arm and face): Like this, with my fingers!

Daniel: How old do you think you'll live to?
Grampa: Heck (yes, he really said "heck"), I might live to 100.
Daniel: How old do you think you'll live to? What age?
Grampa: Oh, about to 70. Don't you think that'd be good?

Grampa: I can't tell a potato chip from a horse kip.

Leslie: Grampa, are you crazy?
Grampa: A little bit, a little bit crazy.

Leslie: How old are you? Are you 25?
Grampa: No, not that young. I'm about 38.
Leslie: What if you were 95?
Grampa: Oh, no! I'm definitely not that old!

Grampa (looking at a picture of himself): That man there is balding ... and that's me!

Leslie: Good-bye, Grampa!
Grampa: Good-bye, Gramma!

Daniel: Look at that ant.
Grampa (squishes it): It's gone now.

Grampa: Well, I'm going to bed. There's no point staying up for you! You (pointing to Daniel) can take care of yourself. And you (pointing at me) don't need anybody to take care of you. So, I'm goin' to bed!

Grampa: I'm hungry. But I can't say anthing.
Aunt Liz: Oh, you're full of bologne!
Grampa: Well, that's what I've been eating.

Grampa (to me): You're a clown! (I don't even remember what I was doing to deserve this title. But at least it was probably making him smile.)

Grampa: Bob, I've lost my mind.
Uncle Bob: Have you?
Grampa: Yes, and after breakfast, I'm going to go find it.

And, just for good measure, a picture of The Old Man himself.

For whatever reason, this particular day, he thought it would be a good idea to wear 2 slippers on his left foot. He was like this pretty much all day!

Monday, November 14, 2011

Denim Rag Quilt

So, I have been working on a raggedy quilt of late, made out of old jeans. It's been a long project, and I'm still not finished with it. But my mother asked to see pictures of what has been done so far. So, this is me fulfilling that request. 

I tried doing the diagonal stripes thing ... but I wasn't that into it.

I tried flipping blocks over to show the flannel that I love (that's the backing) ... but that was over-kill.
This is the final setting (see how I used quilting terminology, Mom?): completely random. If you can call it random, I did place them that way intentionally.
All the rows, sewn together.

Sewn rows laid out. Next step: sewing the rows together.

I will post more pictures of the completed project. I'm very excited! Raggedy quilts are so cozy, aren't they? I think it's going to turn out smashing!!

Thursday, November 3, 2011

A Subtle Sweet-Tooth

Sometimes, I take Grandpa shopping. 
Sometimes, when I take him shopping, he develops a sweet tooth. 
Sometimes, when we go shopping and he develops a sweet tooth, he grabs things. 
Like today. 
When he put the following in our shopping cart:

And, of course, we humor him. He is, after all, 95 years old. Spoiled Old Man!
Here is the result of his sweet tooth (you know I had to take a picture):

Just as a side note: one time, he grabbed a snicker's bar and put it in his pocket. It's a good thing I caught him, or we would've been in trouble when we tried to leave the market!


We had a pretty low-key Halloween: 
we didn't dress up (well, I was wearing black and orange ... doesn't that sort of count? And my make-up is funky. Isn't it a rule that you have to be outrageous with your make-up on Halloween?); 
we did pass out candy, but we ran out at 7:30 and had to go inside and turn off all the lights; 
we did carve a pumpkin, but ... well, you'll see.

Carving a baby pumpkin

Eating candy on Halloween ... Appropriate, yes?

Baby pumpkin. It's cute. I like it.

Hope you all had a fabulous Halloween!